So I’m stuck at home with a bad cold and need to eat.  I don’t have anything my fridge but fortunately this morning Mark Bittman published his easiest recipes in the NYTimes.  One of them is for Socca, an Italian flatbread made from chickpea flower, olive oil, water, and a ton of pepper.  I have all these ingredients and Mr. Bittman assures me it’s 99% foolproof so I decide to give it a shot.  The batter is easy to put together and I pour it in my pizza pan and get it in my hot oven.  Two minutes later I open the door and smoke pours out – the pan is warped and the batter has shifted to the right, leaving the thin remains to burn under the element.  I close the door and tell myself it will be fine, it’s 99% foolproof.  Sure enough, 7 minutes later the smoke has stopped and the batter is baking nicely.  The instructions say to put the pan on the top shelf under the broiler for the last five minutes to crisp it up so that’s what I do.  The next time I open the oven door the bread is on fire.  The charred bits lit up under the broiler and set it all off.  I’m laughing so hard that on top of my cold-infected lungs, I barely have enough air to blow it out.  I manage to get it under control and still save 1/2 the bread which although slightly charred tastes quite nice.  My apartment stinks though and it’s now official that I am a fool.